A Peaceful Day

The last afternoon of July, 2017, had been peaceful for me.

I woke up around 6AM today. Slept again a few minutes after. Woke up at 7, then at again 8. I remember reading fanfiction until 9AM.

I did the usual, spent about an hour and a half in the bathroom thinking about life then eating downstairs afterwards. I figured it was going to be a nice day when we had chicken nuggets.

Both of my siblings left for school while I didn’t have classes for the day. I started to set the table and went online. No one to talk to with my mom downstairs and my dad upstairs, it was nice.

I can’t remember most of what I’ve done and searched for while on the laptop but it was nice.

I, by the way, bid for two Zelo cards. I am doomed. I still have to buy an awful lot of items.

Past 3PM (or was it 4?), my dad woke up and went to the room where I was. He was hungry and I suggested he cook the bacon. He asked to buy some eggs, too. We spent a few minutes, together with my mom, eating eggs and bacon — in the afternoon. And, as Filipinos, we ate it with rice.

My dad might or might not have slept again and I continued to watch Korean videos. JJ Project has released their comeback song! I watched Laboum, APRIL, and WJSN. I love those three. Talented young kids, I wish for their great future.

At night, I cooked rice and my mom cooked paksiw. My dad ate while I continued to watch videos. My sister arrived, then my brother. It became a bit noisier and it was sad that my peaceful day has come to an end. My sister and I watched Cinderella before eating dinner.

Now, as I am writing this post, I am watching B.A.P videos. It’s been a bit hard to listen to other groups after the Super Pop Concert (will be blogging about it soon!), it’s been about 3 or 4 weeks and I only ever play B.A.P until today. I love them.

I am about to go to sleep with an assignment not yet finished.

Overall, it was nice having some time alone, enjoying the things I enjoy. I did not have to talk to anyone. I didn’t have to speak. I just let my mind flow. I let myself enjoy the silence. Then let myself enjoy the music I played a couple of hours after I started. I don’t expect anything from myself and there is not anyone around who expects me to do something. I was just myself, the best kind of feeling.


A Bad Day

Haven’t had time to publish posts but I’ll share how my day went today.

First off, I woke up late today and arrived at class late. I failed the quiz, too.

The 3 hours after that was okay. I was with a few classmates and had time to talk to them which was fun.

The worst part of the day came afterwards. During Strength class, a few minutes before the time, the professor asked me to answer something on the board. I have a really big problem with being called and coming in front so I became very tense. I couldn’t answer his question. I didn’t know what the answer was. He started shouting at me and my nervousness worsened. I knew I wasn’t the brightest. At that time, I just wanted to go in front of a running car and die then and there. I wouldn’t have minded, really.

I went back to my seat and he made me go back to the board. He shouted at me again and again. I started to feel really bad about myself. My classmates were, thankfully, shouting what to do.

Before the class was dismissed, I remember crying. I couldn’t stop the tears. I was nervous, scared, and felt so little.

I know I should be, but I really can’t take it when people yell at me. My parents never did. I am not used to it and I usually cry when people shout, even when it’s not directed at me. Yelling at me is ten times worse, though.

I spent about 5 minutes inside the restroom crying and laughing at how pathetic I looked like, why I was crying at something people think is too small to worry about.

The next class was okay. I still spent about 10 minutes tearing up while the professor was discussing about Delta to Wye and Wye to Delta. I figured out what to do when we had a seat work, thankfully.

The ride home was okay. I wasn’t sleepy but I did tear up again every few minutes.

Today was really hard. This week has been hard. At some points, I was tempted to cut myself, tempted to go in front of a running truck to stop all the pain. I want everything to stop.

Six Days

Oh, hello!

I haven’t posted anything in six days so I posted a few today! Yay!

I only have about two weeks left till my vacation ends and school starts again. Although I’ve started attending Korean language lessons last Saturday.

The past two weeks have been very stressful and tiring, but also fun.

We picked up a few merchandise for Beagles Fan Shoppe and got to talk to fellow Korean Pop fans as well.

Will be blogging about everything tomorrow, I promise. Haha!

Come to think about it, I haven’t even posted a review of the BTOB album I showed two months ago.

Good night~

I Wish to Write

Oh, good day! I do not have much energy today to write about what had happened the past week, but I opened the computer because I badly wanted to write/type.

Today was pretty tiring. I slept at 2AM today and woke up at 9AM. I went to the mall at 11AM and then had foot spa in the afternoon.

I have been going out since Friday for various reasons and my body is too tired. I am tired.

I have a schoolmate coming tomorrow. It’s going to be a long day again.

I did get to watch FRIENDS and the Big Bang Theory today so it was still a pretty nice day.

What else should I say?

I hope everyone has a great time. Take care always~